My First & Last Time.

The first time I caught glimpses of her and craved to be her friend, I felt a strange emotion never felt before and knew I was in love. 

The first time I held her hands, my heartbeat went crazy, my hand sweat as I gazed into her eyes longingly.

The first time we hold the keys to our new flat, I knew we were on our own, on a new path of life with heavier responsibility on our shoulders.

The first time we set eyes on our very own baby boy and held him in our arms, we felt the joy of parenthood.

The first time we saw him tumbles as he takes his first few steps, we laughed with excitement.

The first time we saw him shivers with bouts of fever in the middle of the night, we trembled in cold sweats too.

The first time we left him in the hospital bed and watches him cry in pain, our heart ache and cried with him.

The first time we brought him to kindergarten, we felt a sense of pride as we knew he was on the road to a world of knowledge.  

The first time we took our son to the dentist and watched him fidget anxiously as he awaits the extraction of his first milk tooth, our hearts went out to him.

The first time our teenage boy experience the queasy feeling of puppy love, we knew he has grown older.

The first time we had a photo with him and his sweetheart at his university coronation, we knew he did it.  

When the time come for the first time to drink the ceremonial tea and place our "ang-pow" (red envelope stuffed with cash) on the serving plates on his wedding day, we know he is on his own.

Hopefully, when the time comes for the first time we hold his baby boy or girl, we'll realize a new generation is taking shape and we would felt worn and old.

But, the first time we lost our dentures and could not enjoy our favorite apples, we knew a simple pleasure in life had slipped away.

The first time we start feeling joint pain and forgetfulness, we knew age has caught up and realized the nails had gone an inch deeper into our eventual resting bed. 

The first time you wake up as a retiree and wonder what to do with all the time in the world, its time to do things differently, like hitting the chessboard with contemporary, instead of the crowed bus in the morning rush hours.

The first time you are addressed as uncle or auntie, you took offense but slowly got used to the new status. 

The first time you use your senior citizen concession pass and the young man gave his seat to you in a crowed bus, you know your new status is engraved on the forehead of your wrinkled face forever.  

So much of the first time, what about the last time you did something in your life?
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Can you remember the last time you drove your car and is now driven instead? Yes, I drive a taxi everyday!

What about the last time you pay your own bills? Yes. I pay the bills reluctantly through the internet promptly every month. 

Go to the bank? I don't go to the bank since I can use internet for transaction..

Visit your doctor on your own? I do it on my own every three months for my high blood and cholesterol pills.

Bathe yourself? Of course, I do it myself without the help of the maid.

How about sleeping or sharing the common bed with your spouse? Yes, still do. 

Saying 'I Love You'? Seldom, prefer to show it than say it.

Hold hands? Seldom, unless crossing busy roads or walking down a slippery slope. 

Remembering the name of your spouse before Alzheimer's disease ruin your life? God Forbid!

I had answered all the questions positively with a proud smile now, but soon, like it or not, I had to reverse my answers with a succumbed moan. That's the reality and inevitability of life.

Anyway, in between all the first and last times are the years of good times interspersed with bad times, difficult times, and discovering times. They make us what we are and prepare us to face the end time. One day we will close our eyes for the last time and if we live our lives right, awake on the other side of life's river to discover an eternity with no time to regret or miss.